In Theaters: 03.07.08

This week is full of surprises I never saw coming. First there is a new Jason Statham movie that, for once in a very long time, doesn’t appear to suck. In my calculations it’s the first since Snatch way back in 2000 (I’m not a fan of the Transporter franchise). There is also the new Stephen Chow flick, CJ7. The critics aren’t all for it but I’m a sucker for his movies like Kung Fu Hustle and Shaolin Soccer. Alas, none of these films will rank supreme in the midst of 10,000 B.C. which hopes to trick audiences in its first week in theaters.

More on all those movies in just a bit but first we have to cover Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day featuring Frances McDormand (whom you may remember acting ecstatically after her husband won best director at the Oscars this year). The story follows Miss Pettigrew from lowlife nanny loser to becoming a “social secretary” for a lady with one too many men in her life. It’s nice to see that Frances McDormand is using her acting skills in the right places again since her terrible decision to take place in movies like Aeon Flux and Friends with Money. Looks like she is back on her game, not that she ever really lost it. Sadly, I’m not projecting this doing extremely well at the box office.

Statham may have finally found his calling, just play in a bunch of heist movies. Some actors are well rounded enough to take on a smorgasbord of different types of roles and others just aren’t. Statham falls into the latter category. Anyway, The Bank Job takes place in the groovy 1970’s version of London where Terry (Statham) finds himself a little treasure trove of safety deposit boxes. Of course there is a foolproof plan and so he risks his middle class life to get the major payday. It looks strikingly like a UK version of Ocean’s Eleven. Not a terrible title to have on an opening weekend by any means.

Stephen Chow’s films have always had a bit of whimsical story telling in them but never before like in CJ7. This time around Chow plays a struggling citizen named Ti that can’t seem to catch a break in any part of his life, whether it’s love, work, or raising his child. Then he comes across an alien creature named CJ7 and after mistaking it for a toy brings it home for his kid. The CG work looks pretty low budget considering what the industry standard is these days but that has always been the case with his films. It has never affected them greatly before so I suspect the same with CJ7. Considering what I’ve heard and seen so far this looks like a film for fans of Chow’s previous work more than anything.

Behold the glory of 10,000 B.C. In actuality you’ll be hard pressed to find any real glory in this prehistoric mess. The consensus points out everything I fear about films these days. The plot is generic and extremely inaccurate as far as these films are concerned. This wouldn’t be such a huge problem if it could make up ground in the other departments but it doesn’t. The CGI is second-rate and comparable to the techniques we saw used in 1993’s Jurassic Park. Judging off the trailer alone, the acting also looks subpar. Put this all together and you have a certified box office bust. Look for it to thrill audiences in the first week and then take a turn for the worst once the word of mouth comes in.

In seven days time I’ll take a look at one of the first Apatow productions of the year. And also sneak a peek at the Dr. Seuss adaptation Horton Hears a Who and the new action/adventure project, Doomsday.