Uh-oh, Batman Makes Critics Seem Like Bedwetters

The first few negative reviews for the awesomely sinister new Batman movie, The Dark Knight, have hit the web. They probably tell us more about the film than the positive reviews have so far. Basically every negative thing in these reviews is what has me excited to see it. Here are the best quotes from the first two negative reviews.

The first comes from the incredibly trustworthy and well-respected Star magazine, which explains:

“Why do comic-book movies want to be serious literature? That’s the problem with this movie the same way it was with 2006’s “Superman Returns.” Instead of being exciting pop-culture entertainment that forces the viewer to take it seriously, the movie takes itself too seriously – and misses the fun in the process. Well, almost – the late Heath Ledger seems to be having a great time as the tongue-flicking, homicidal Joker, played as a mad dog with a sense of humor. Whenever Ledger is on the screen, even when the script tries to slow him down, he barrels through with more gleeful evil than you can imagine.”

Basically it’s a bad thing when a comic book movie tries to elevate itself from the pages from which it’s created. Plus, why should it even try to be a serious piece of literature anyway? These are the types of ideals that are just putting a chokehold on credible criticism these days. I guess it doesn’t help much that the opinion is published in Star magazine, and was most likely printed directly across from the “Knifestyles of the Rich and Famous” section. I may be somewhat alone on this point, but Superman Returns was also pretty fantastic. Also, I pose this question: Why does Star Magazine want to be accepted as tolerable reading material?

The next review comes from an arguably more credibly source, although, in recent months I’ve started to doubt that. New York Magazine seems to be opting for the old-timer perspective when it comes to The Dark Knight. Most of the opinions expressed by David Edelstein seem to be along the lines of too noisy, too incredibly awesome to handle. He even went as far to call it a “Quentin Tarantino reservoir dog,” whatever that means. At least he appreciated that Batman was jumping off buildings!

This doesn’t mean fans of the Knight aren’t fighting back, each one of the reviews mentioned has over 150 negative comments each on Rotten Tomatoes. I would say the got what they were asking for (but at least the New York Magazine review tried to back up their opinion).

In contrast with the critics who call it “too dark” there’s the majority who are jizzing their pants all over it. Some of those reviewers even have to take back what they said about Iron Man. I guess a new comic book crown should be handed out? We’ll see.